Gain a new perspective when it comes to being embarrassed about failure.
*Sign up for Weekly Updates HERE!
Welcome to the Be Your Best Self Blog by Marsha Abbott.
"Embarrassed Much?"
Being embarrassed…it’s one of the worst feelings that exist. That sinking feeling in your stomach, the red that slowly creeps up onto your face, and that natural instinct to want to run and hide, so you don’t have to face what just happened. Frankly, all I can say when it comes to embarrassment is this…”it Sucks…with a capital ‘S’”.
And I have had my fair share of embarrassments over the years…to say the least…
But lately, I have been thinking that maybe we should be looking at embarrassment just a little bit differently. Should we really feel the shame and humiliation that comes with it? Should we really be getting that awful feeling in our stomach? And most importantly, should we really be running and hiding from it?
And with these new feelings, I have started to believe that if we want to be our best selves and live our best life, maybe instead we should want to be embarrassed more. So now the real question becomes…Have you been embarrassed enough lately?
When we think about the word embarrassment, it brings with it this natural tendency to assume it is a very bad emotion to experience. In fact, if you look up this word in the dictionary, it doesn’t make it seem any better. Embarrassed is defined as “causing someone to feel awkward, self-conscious, or ashamed.” Yikes…that’s definitely not a good thing! So, if the whole world thinks embarrassment is bad, why am I starting to think that maybe instead it could be good?
I decided that we are going to go against the dictionary’s definition of embarrassment…well, at least for today anyway. Because when I looked up this word, I was really surprised to not see a certain other word that I was expecting. To me, the definition of being embarrassed should really equal failure. It’s as simple as that. When we feel the red creeping up onto our face and when we want to run and hide, it’s simply because we failed in that moment. And failure does bring with it shame, self-consciousness, and awkwardness. But if embarrassment really does equal failure, should we really be avoiding it?
Think about all of the times you felt embarrassed. What was happening in that moment? Was it an inappropriate comment? Was it a mistake you made at work? Did it have to do with a failed relationship? Could it have been an addiction that snuck its way back in?
Whatever the case, in those moments, you failed. In those moments, I failed. In moments like these, we allfail. But as far as I am concerned, failure is a part of life, and it’s actually a good thing. In fact, I have learned more about myself and my character through my mistakes. Those are the times that stick out in my mind the most, reminding me to do better and to be better. It’s the secret that failure brings to us all...
Without failure, we would never question how to be a better human. We would never take risks. We would never look back and say ‘what-if’ because none of that would exist in a perfect world. So without embarrassment, we would fail to do the same. We would fail to figure out a way to learn, to grow, and to change.
Beau Toplin quoted it best when he said, “Better an ‘oops” than a “what-if’. And I agree with him whole-heartedly! I would rather walk through life knowing I took every opportunity in front of me and ran with it…mistakes or not. I would rather look back and know that I did the very best I could…even if I failed. I would rather live with no regrets…embarrassments and all.
I hope you agree with me on this.
Because if you do then I am going to ask you this again…” Are you embarrassed enough in your life?” Are you failing enough? And if you aren’t, then something has to change, or you will never find that path to become the person you were always meant to be.
So the next time you feel the awkwardness set in and you feel the red blush creeping up your neck and onto your face, I want to you to pause and enjoy that ‘sinking’ feeling in your stomach. And instead of hating it, instead of thinking that it sucks…with a capital ‘S’, it should instead be your reminder that you are taking chances. It should validate that you are in fact living life. It should prove that you are working hard to be the best version of yourself that you can be.
And as far as I am concerned, no matter who you are or what you have done or failed to do, that is something to be proud of…mistakes, failure, embarrassment and all.
*For those of you struggling with something in life or have a topic of interest that you want me to talk about in this blog, email me at BeYourBestSelfBlog@gmail.com. Let’s work together to Be Our Best Selves!